Please educate me.

[iccyman001]

I wanted to hear from some of you experienced guys on this subject, so please don\'t hold back.

How much did hunting slow down once you got married?
How much did it slow down once you have kids?

What are some ways that you and your family compromised along the years to get you in the woods?

 

[OldMan]

You won\'t like this, but it\'s honest.

My hunting didn\'t slow down at all when I got married.

It also didn\'t slow down when we had a daughter.

Now i\'m single.

 

[F M]

To be honest when I got married and had my son it really did not change allot just had to go at different times that worked for my wife and work but back then I only hunted whitetails. I did not start hunting elk and turkeys till my kids where in high school but that was more of a finance deal.

My wife does not hunt or fish but she knew that I liked my time out in the woods so she does not get on me to bad. I have found that I have to let her have time to do what she wants to do. One year while I was in CO hunting her and a girlfriend went to Hawaii.

 

[bnsafe]

my wife could care less what i do so i hunt when i want how much on want. but most arent like that. and i paid a very high price, just didnt know it at the time.

 

[cnelk]

Dan
There is a definitely a \'speed bump\' of some of the amount of time with the wifey, but once she understands, or goes along its all good.

Kids, same way. But it wont take long and they will be tagging along too.
The thing I learned is that when the kids come, you may not see a damn thing. But thats not why youre doing it....

 

[Russel Reed]

If you think hunting is more important than your wife and family, you are doomed from the very start!

This is a very straight forward answer to the questions you shouldn\'t even be considering if you truly love the person you intend to marry. I think you will learn that you both have to bend once in awhile. If you treat her right, she will do the same in return.

 

[iccyman001]

If you think hunting is more important than your wife and family, you are doomed from the very start!

This is a very straight forward answer to the questions you shouldn\'t even be considering if you truly love the person you intend to marry. I think you will learn that you both have to bend once in awhile. If you treat her right, she will do the same in return.

I should have put a disclaimer! I would never put a hobby before my loved ones! My fianc? and I get along so well. I take care of (spoil her ) and love every minute of it. In return, she lets me hunt when I need to. We both love each other and are very flexible. I will never let this become an issue in our relationship.


The reason I ask is, I hear the same things over and over from married guys. \"Oh, you\'re getting married? Kiss hunting goodbye.\" \"Don\'t even think of trying to hunt when you have kids.\" Etc etc.

I know they are being a bit dramatic, so that\'s why I wanted to hear it from people who would tell the truth!

 

[cohunter14]

Dan, as someone with a young family, here is what I can tell you... Once I got married, that didn\'t change a thing. My wife understands how much I love hunting and would let me go, even though she would give me a hard time about it occasionally. After the first kid, I was still able to make the same hunting trips. I was fortunate in the fact that he was born in February, so by the time hunting season rolled around, he was sleeping through the night, etc. (I definitely thought about this when we were trying to have kids ). This year is the first time it hindered my hunting as we had twins in April. Twins is a whole different animal! It complicates everything quite a bit. However, this next year I expect to be back to my usual hunting time.

Now, for full disclosure: my \'usual hunting\' is nowhere near what you currently have :lol: I typically go dove hunting in Sept with one or two nights away from home, antelope hunting in October or December with one or two nights away from home, and then elk hunting, where I am gone for six nights. I also do some waterfowl and/or bird hunting, but typically I am not gone overnight for those, which is the big thing for my wife. I don\'t think I could get away with a whole lot more on an annual basis, but then again I don\'t need to.

The good thing for you is that your fiance knows how much you currently hunt and how much it means to you. That is a big deal in my opinion.

 

[treble]

Happy wife equals happy life....

Unfortunately my wife was never able to have kids, we\'ve been married 17 years. And if anything my Hunting\'s amped up tenfold...... Hunting is like anything you love ......if you truly do love it ......you will make time for it

 

[OldMan]

For the record. My wife was a good woman, and I loved her to death. The problem was she knew who I was when we got married. I didn\'t know it at the time, but she had plans to change me to what she wanted. That wasn\'t going to work.

I told her she would be better off finding someone else that fit her idea of a husband. It was a friendly separation, and was best for both of us.

I never wanted to go through that again, and stayed single. I have no regrets. As Popeys says........I yam what I yam!

 

[Deertick]

Well, it does change things. I didn\'t hunt seriously before I was married ... oh, I hunted, but back then I didn\'t have time to do it well.

Being married will take time away ... you\'ll have another family -- hers -- and they\'ll have graduations and funerals and weddings and they\'ll all seem to come in September through November.

And children do change not just the time you have to hunt but also the way you hunt. You\'ll turn into an amateur guide.

Taking time for yourself (say, for instance, an elk hunt) is a good thing, and likewise your wife should be encouraged and even required to do the same. It\'s healthy. Your children, in time, should be encouraged, too, to strike off on their own, whether that\'s hunting or sports or band trips or Boy Scouts.

But when you all are home, you\'ll need to shut that off, and model commitment for the kids, so they can see what that means.

In the end, I\'m sure I\'d have hunted more without my family, but I really don\'t think it would be by much.

 

[Zpd307]

dan, first make sure your wife/soon to be understands what hunting means to you. if she doesn\'t, you will have a hard start of it. my wife understood that. my first serious relationship of 6 years didn\'t and threw fits about it every fall. man we had some arguments.... but along those same lines, I also put in lots of time for the wife during non hunting times. so it equals out to say.... lots of give and take. before the kids came, I got her into shooting guns and she also started hunting. guns and hunting were not part of her family growing up.... she has shot a couple of turkeys. has been deer hunting. and now wants to go elk hunting.
yes, if you are family orientated, hunting will slow down at first. for me it was money, and, also leaving and having the wife fend for herself with the kids and house. to me that\'s not very fair.... she knew, even before I started elk hunting, that it was a long time desire to hunt out west. and has been very supportive of me with it. for which I am glad, as it takes a special person to understand a person who is gone for 2 weeks straight and spent a lot of money doing it. and especially when for 3 years in a row, hasn\'t come back with anything to show for it.
I have placed elk hunting as my top priority now. I deer hunt when I can, but make no special plans for it. turkey hunting involves driving 2 miles from the house and I take the boys whenever I can.
now..... that the boys are getting older, and the wife is making way more money than I am, I can start taking them on more hunting adventures. I have 2 more falls to wait before I can take my oldest to Wyoming and hunt antelope. this year he can hunt deer in mn, turns 10 on November 4th. this fall he should also be able to swing his youth model 20 gauge a lot better for ducks. the kid as a 8 year old has 2 turkeys under his belt! they are all a year apart, so it will be a trickle effect onto the other 2 boys. its easier justify the trip when the boys get to go alone.
I am going to take them on a camping trip to the big horns this summer. hiking and fishing for brookies in a mtn lake! momma wont have any vacation because of the new job....

 

[timberland]

Yep my hunting slowed way down. Like was mentioned before, my family size more than quadrupled in size. I found out how important nieces and nephews first, second , third birthdays are :wtf: No more two week hunting and fishing trips. Money became tight when the kids were young. But it was worth it. I realize after 20+ years of marriage a good woman was what I needed to straighten out some of my misaligned priorities. But I do get to hunt and fish as much as I want, it just seems that I just don\'t want to as much. I\'m not obsessed with it anymore.

 

[elky McElkerson]

i\'m happily married and ZERO kids.

my hunting slowed way down. why? i want to stay married. so i had to kill the selfish side of me. not all of my work vacation time can be allotted to time hunting. if that was the way i was gonna go, i should stay single. i dont live life solely for myself anymore. all of my decisions, no matter how small affects another person.

i just blew off this autumn, and took my wife to Taiwan and Tokyo for one of the best times of my life. sucked up a bunch of money too...it was AWESOME! helped remind me why i married her. she travels well, and smiles every day. i love that.

my mistake? marrying her in the winter. forever now i have to occasionally eff up an anniversary. ouch!! i also dont shop like a fool anymore. i run my purchases past her first. she rarely says, \"no\"..so i am okay with her saying so.

i have a coworker. best hunter i know. alaska to florida. he hunted it. he got married and had kids..he is now divorced and broke..and hunting again. but he isnt the happy dude i knew before.

no thank you.

 

[OldMan]

Some should be married, and some shouldn\'t. Simple as that. I\'ve had a happy life being single.

 

[Swede]

Getting married requires compromise. Having children requires compromise. I have always been able to find some time for hunting, but I am never able to hunt all I want. That is a matter of priorities, and finances.

 

[razorback]

My wife and I are from the same small town and graduated high school two years apart. Everybody knew hunting was my \"thing\". I was very up front with her during our engagement about how serious I was about hunting. She was okay with it but shared no interest in getting involved with hunting with me. The funny thing was after getting married I found I wanted to spend less time away from the house overnight (she\'s a good cook). I\'ve been married for 19 years now and have one son. Dee Dee has supported me every step of the way. Sometimes we argue over my hunting budget but in all honesty she keeps me in check. For a lady that doens\'t hunt or care much for it, she knows quite a bit about hunting though. She\'s surprised me with some awesome presents over the years that I would have never thought she would have had a clue I was even interested in (see pic Benelli SBE2).

My son turned out just like me. His first deer hunt he was very lucky to harvest a small doe and that was all it took. He was hooked for life. He lives and breathes all things archery.

I\'ll admit my family is probably unique because of my job though. I\'ve spent a great amount of time away from them and they\'re used to me being gone. I try to take advantage of the time home with them and be spontaneous. Sometimes a day trip to the mall and then dinner will go a long way.

I\'ve been blessed and most folks would probably say I married \"UP\"

 

[Ol' Arky]

My wife knew what see was gettin\' before we got married 49 years ago... :upthumb: :upthumb:

My 2 boys when with me with thye were too young roth bothe love it as much as I do and we all know when to go and when not to go...

 

[iccyman001]

I just wanted to thank everyone for their honest advice! This thread is a huge help.



One thing that I can say is that she knows how much of a hunter I am and how much I love it!

Last year was hunting throughout four different states for about 6 different species over a five month span.
This year I am taking it even higher!!!!


Again, thank you everyone who posted.

 

[Russel Reed]

Last year was hunting throughout four different states for about 6 different species over a five month span.
This year I am taking it even higher!!!!

Sounds like you are setting yourself up for disaster. Unless she likes to hunt as much as you seem to, don\'t expect her to be there waiting for you when you get home from all that many hunts in other states every year.

With that attitude, I\'d give you chances of a successful marriage about a 1 in 100 shot. God and family should always come first. 42 years of being married to the same wonderful woman have taught me at least that much.