This happened to me .... or what not to do....

[Bob Frapples]

Im ready to hear some comic relief....


So I just started a new job and they found out I'm going out west this year and one guy that expressed interest about going told me he had been to CO one time before.


When we talked about gear he said he had bought a 45$ all weather, snow proof, rain proof, wind proof, you name it jam up backpacking lighter just for their back country trip.    When he got up on the mountain he never got it to light, not once in 7 days.  Had to bum a light from his buddies with their 99c bics.  Soon as he got back to the truck and ever since it has never failed to light first try.


Said he didn't think there could possibly be that many jokes about overpaying for non working lighters.

 

[cnelk]

2006 - Archery Elk Camp


Throughout the week, every night in the middle of the night we would hear scurrying in the wall tents [We had 2 tents set up]


We all thought it was a pine marten hopping around


One night, the 'critter' jumped on my buddies sleeping bag while he was sleeping, it woke him up, so he punched the sleeping bag from inside to knock the critter off...


The next night, my son had come up for the weekend. In the middle of the night, I heard scurrying in my wall tent between the cots...


I reached over to get my head lamp to see what the hell it was.


As the bright beam landed on the 'critter' all I saw was a small, weird looking black and white skunk!!!


Holy Crap!!!  That tent got real small, real quick


The skunk ran out of my tent, and over to my buddies tent....


I quickly got dressed and went over and thumped on their wall tent and said "HEY! There's a skunk in your tent!"


That tent also shrunk in size in a hurry....


The skunk dashed from tent to tent.... we tried to scare it off but all it would do it bury under the gear


By this time its about 4am. We had had enough. I went to my truck and got my handgun and intercepted that bastard.


Did you know that a Western Spotted Skunk does handstands before it sprays???


But the bullet went thru its head before that happened

 

[DTP]

2016 Elk camp

We had a guy who I could write a novel on, but I'll stick to a few of the silly things....
Every morning he would wake up about 45 minutes earlier than everyone, light a fire, and then sit in the smoke for about 30 minutes "masking his scent."

Cool, I know some people are into that, but it kind of defeats the purpose when you are cooking eggs, bacon, and sausage on that same fire and being covered in that smell too...
It also didn't help that when he was done sitting in the smoke, him and his dog would head off in his truck to hunt.

It's a known fact that elk cant smell hunters that are covered in bacon grease and dog hair

 

[cohunter14]

I've told this story before, but a few years back we were all setup the day prior to our 1st season rifle elk hunt and decided to go down the hill towards town to get cell service and check in with the family since it might be a few days before we get another chance. On our way down the hill, we run into a BIG southern boy in his overalls sitting on an atv (we're talking easily tipping the scales at well over 300lbs...I'd guess closer to 350 or more). We chat for a bit and he tells us he's "fixin to probably park right here and wander in that way a bit tomorrow morning." It was obvious that he wasn't going to make it far...just sitting there talking with us he was breathing pretty hard. But, just like the majority of hunters you come across, he was a great guy and we wished him well and continued on.


The next morning, wouldn't you know it? The first shot came from his direction. We had a bit of a chuckle going 'no way was that him'. It sure was! I didn't see it, but word was he took a big 6x6 right after first light! I still get a smile thinking about it and honestly have to laugh at myself a bit at the same time. I would have given him about a 2% chance of shooting an elk and he walked out with a trophy in an area that was a heck of a lot easier to pack out compared where I ended up shooting my elk that year!


Elk are where you find them and you can't kill one from the couch. If that guy was able to do it, there are very few who can't!

 

[backcountry_hunter]

Not my story but have always found this one too funny not to share:


I grew up in a small town that was very well known in the waterfowling communtiy. Most of the residents hunted waterfowl but the area would multiply in the fall with out of area hunters. None the less one high school acquaintance of mine lived very close to a major weltand complex well known throughout the country and we always found it odd that he nor his family hunted being in such a prime location. Come to find out his dad tried it twice and cut his losses due to safety issues.


The first time he and a buddy we're going to hunt canada geese in a field and wanting to be prepared they set up their decoys the evening before they were planning to hunt. They spent a majority of that night drinking heavily and barely made it to the field the next morning. To their surprise the geese were already in the field so they crafted (what I can only imagine to be) the sneak of the century to the flock of geese in their field. On the count of three they both stood up and fired their 3 shells (6 total) only to have 6 dead decoys in their posession.


The 2nd time he went out they spent the entire evening drinking again and shot a hole in the boat the following morning. They had to swim and/or wade back to the boat landing. I can't recall how many people were with on this one.


Both of these instances happpened back in the late 80's so the statute of limitations should be up by now 


After that it was apparent that for safety's sake he should either quit drinking or quit hunting so he chose to quit hunting.


That's probably why I don't drink, or at least part of the equation....

 

[Boom]

very similar story to the big guy on an ATV.

we went to IDAHO.  chasing elk.  we brought along a guy that did ZERO prep.  no exercise.  he was in very poor shape.  he had great heart, so he tried.  my brother and i covered a lot of miles.  on one outing, we found a damp field.  there was some shoot growing up and we noticed a few were bitten off.  the cut ends were oozing moisture still, so fresh was an understatement.  we put a pin in the location, saving it for later.

after a few days, our friend was DONE.  everyday he would be so exhausted we would hand him a plate of food, he empties it, he goes to bed.  he was so tired, any camp chores from him was not gonna happen.  haha.  i was hunting, so getting sour at doing extra work was not an option.  i was not gonna let that get me down.

that last day..the last evening.  he said he wasnt gonna hunt.  no way!!  we lead him to that area with the chewed greenery..we cut a quick blind and sat him on a log.  told him we would get him after dark.  we hiked off.

i kid you not..sun going down.  i am hiding in spot.  i hear. plop plop plop..some hooved creature was walking around..then i hear the radio go, "i g.ggggg goo  got one!"  i didnt go after the plop..i was dark. 

a bull walked up to 17 yards of my exhausted friend.  he put an arrow right into the heart.  hahaha..

we handled meat well into the night.  it was a happy load of weight. 

sometimes it pays to be the fat guy. 

 

[cohunter14]

sometimes it pays to be the fat guy. 

:haha: :haha: :haha:

 

[Ivar88]

The first elk hunt I was ever a part of was my own DIY in the Gila Wilderness. This was actually the first year I picked up hunting to begin with, so I brought along a guy who claimed to be a very good hunter. Little did I know he meant he was good at shooting hand fed deer in Texas. Anyway, on day 5 of 10, I had followed a bugle up a small hill and when I got up top, there was nice 5x5 standing broadside, head down eating. Now, before I left to head up this hill, I told this fella to sit tight and I'll come back down and get him in a while. He had a different idea. He thought he would like to film this action so after I started to ascend the hill, he apparently came right up after me. Fast forward to me at full draw, turning around a big ponderosa, when I see the elk is a dead sprint away from me. NO WAY HE SAW ME! I looked behind me and this dude dives into a bush from plain site. He knew what he had done.

 

[Ol Arky]

Not elk but kinda funny to my buddies at least...
As most of you know I have hunted ducks in the flooded timber of south Arkansas for way too many years to mention... During those years this happened to me way too many times to be funny...
As most know big oak trees in the bottomlands of south Arkansas tend to fall from time to time due to several factors... Big oak trees have big root systems which create big deep holes in the ground when that root system come up when the tree falls... When I was younger I always like to see it I could find those big deep hole regularly... As I grew older it became apparent that I needed to avoid those big deep holes create by the root systems of fallen big oak trees... I still found them from time to time but not on a regular basis anymore...
One cold, cold morning back in 1999 before daylight we were walking in to hunt. Water was about half knee deep and did I say cold.... My old black Lab that was 12 years old at the time lead me in as usual... He was better than a any GPS... He encountered the fresh blow downs 1st and without missing a step avoided the big deep hole created by the uprooted BIG oak tree... Needless to say I wasn't watching him close enough... A lot of thrashing and splashing occurred... All my buddies tried their best and the silence was deafening for about 5 seconds until they broke into laughter... Even my old Lab smiled... After that morning I invested in a new bright light so I could see what lay in wait for me on the cold, cold dark early morning walk-ins.... Since then the "stump holes" have been avoided, most of the time anyhow... :lol: :lol: